I found myself writing paragraphs here and there processing life, grief, growth, beauty, and travel. They never felt like whole blogposts, so they found themselves lost in old notes on my phone, in text threads with friends, and sometimes as instagram captions. I wanted to find them a home. This is my online journal. Currently on a journey of moving to a medical ship in West Africa. There will be lots of updates here to follow along.
I am SO thankful I am here for training. For Mercy Ships, this is called “Onboarding”, which includes…
It was touch and go for a minute if I could even go to Texas for training this month. Bags packed on Monday, I got a message that I might not be able to come due to the covid spike and lockdowns around the country. After conversations throughout the day and emails, I found out…
I started noticing in the midst of quarantine that when I was finally given all the time I’ve ever wanted, I still ended up on my phone. I still ended up on youtube, TikTok, Instagram, or Facebook. It was humbling, to say the least. I thought if only I had enough time, I would learn the guitar, take up running, learn a language, start illustrating and writing more. I just watched more Netflix. I just scrolled more.
I needed to cope through the…
I miss train rides. Looking out plane windows and clutching the armrests for a bumpy landing. I miss walking into a new bedroom.
A bedroom that will become a home for a while.
Unzipping my suitcases and digging around for a phone charger and my tooth brush. The essentials after a day worth of traveling.
As a third culture kid, these temporary homes are home. I’ve never felt so stifled and so trapped in my life. I think everyone feels like that right now.
This is the longest I’ve…
but above all I'm sixteen. The iconic age. And it's probably one of the most terrifying thing out of all of that. That I only have one more month to ever be 16 again. And I don't know how to handle that- how to react. Should I do some stuff? Should I celebrate the month? Should I cry? Or celebrate. I don't know. But I do know what is the only thing that scares me more than the reality of my aging... That I'm a junior in highschool. The age that people will….
This season has been very strange. I’ve felt stretched in what I use to think was trusting God- what I use to think was walking blindly in faith. I’m in Memphis. In whiplash of Covids effects globally and personally, I’ve found myself living with a best friend I never thought I would get to share a home with- I’m reading more than I ever have (it’s not a lot, but it’s better than my a book a year track record.) I’m still in a nomadic mindset, trying not to dig my uplifting roots to deep, but they are desperate for security. My new move date is…
So I’m still in America... I was expecting to be settling into ship life off the coast of West Africa in these July days, however as we are all very weary of discussing, Covid19 has had other plans. I have this weird habit of taking photos of dropped food in city streets because there is something so tragically funny about it. I found these two from earlier this year. Im sure many can relate that life feels a little like either your pizza just fell on the ground, or you are the pizza that has been dropped on the ground. 😂 Though I’m continuing to remind myself that….
Photography isn’t a necessity to life. It hasn’t been around for centuries. Documentation isn’t even a necessity of life, however, as humans, we have been documenting through countless mediums forever. Paintings, writings, pressing flowers, saving postcards and momentous, spoken word, lyrics, videos, and photos. I started documenting before I ever touched my first camera. I saved little…
Recently I drove down a block towards the church I spent jr high and high school at, and it hit me. I spent 5 years with this drive being the most normal drive. I don’t want to forget how many normals I’ve had. The speed bumps mt flip flops would trudge over headed to the neighborhood pool at grammys in the summers in America. The potholes on briercrest road that would cut out my radio. The halls of the church that even when i didn’t feel like I fit, it was predictable and it fit- it never changed. I Never want to forget knowing that
Nine years ago today I took this photo four months before moving | time passes slowly but also all at once. When I saw this view again, I felt a peace I’ve never felt. We dragged our luggage down escalators and loaded them onto the Izbon. At our stop Bostanli, we wandered up almost familiar cobble streets to our Airbnb. I was relieved to be here. To be in Bostanli. It all felt…
I honestly don’t remember if I used these, but I found this note from 2019 in my phone. The photo was definitely from a second date. Just not sure if the questions were necessary for conversation. Not sure what I was anticipating, but clearly I anticipated the need for these.
“If you were office supplies what would you be?
What are three things you always want to be
“It feels like my heart has finally gotten to catch its breath. It’s finally had moment to not hurt. Like the hurt is paused for two weeks. Im home.” I wrote this looking out onto the most familiar yet rare sight. With the wind sweeping past me so strongly I couldn’t hear much around me. Being a TCK is really cool. I’ve lived two very different lives in two very different countries. With the auto-cool factor I spent way too much of middle school and high school hiding my differences. I would play a game to…
When you travel, you are in constant hunt of people you can stay with. It’s one of the beauties of networking and friends. Prepping to fly to Arizona, there was a little anxiety. I was headed to see people who I hadn’t seen since I was 9. The Norriss’ were a huge part of my childhood. Even if I don’t remember a lot of our memories together, I do know the moment I walked into their Phenoix home, that everything was
Notes as Lasya makes Egg Masala and Dal….Her kitchen was filled the scents of cumin, onions, and everything good. She greeted me at the door, and made me tea. As she cooked, I opened each container in her pantry and we laughed as I guessed what was in each one. We ate dinner discussing the importance of….
I feel never turned off- always not enough. Not doing enough, not fulfilling the simple roles I play in life. Consistently missing texts and calls- replying to emails inconsistently either immediately or 5 days later. My room is overwhelming. I don't feel…
